When was the last time you compared yourself with someone else?
Comparison is something we have always had to deal with, but social media has made it an even bigger issue.
We can now look up any celebrity and marvel at their perfect cheekbones, family, and overall life. We know that this does not benefit us in any way, but we still do it!
And then we go down the rabbit hole of questioning ourselves: I don’t look like that. Should I look like that? Why don’t I look like that?
We’re all tired of the “think positive” mantra. We manage to think positively for a few days, but this eventually wears off and we’re back to comparing ourselves with anyone we find online who looks better than we do.
We forget that social media is only a façade and that most of these people are using filters, even going so far as to photoshop clear skin and hourglass figures.
And those that aren’t doctoring photos are only sharing the highlights. We’re not seeing the boring days or the days you feel so down that you can barely get out of bed.
We’re essentially living in a world of pretense and false advertising. Nothing is as it seems and I’m constantly finding myself having to investigate things before trusting, which has become rather exhausting.
Here’s how I learned to stop comparing myself with others.
Limit your time on social media.
After spending hours scrolling on our phones, we tend to feel guilty. And on top of this guilt, we’re seeing all these people living these fantastic lives and wonder where we’ve gone wrong.
I quickly noticed that my mental health was declining the more I scrolled, so I decided to write out a list of the different things I could be doing instead of being on my phone.
That’s how I got back into writing and learning new languages. Consider what you would prefer to be doing and try that instead of spending hours on social media!
Social media isn’t all negative, of course, but I started carefully curating who I follow to have a better experience with it.
Every few months do a bit of a cleanup and ask yourself: Does this person’s content bring me joy? Do I find myself comparing where I am with where they are?
The other thing that is sometimes necessary to do is to delete the social media apps that you find yourself on for too long. I was constantly checking Instagram, so I had to delete the app off my phone, making it harder for me to get to it!
Do whatever it takes, but know that spending less time looking at other people will help you become a much happier, healthier person.
Sit with yourself more.
Set aside 5 minutes for yourself each day to reflect and rest. So many of us are constantly on the go all day and struggle to find any time to sit alone.
When you sit with yourself and your thoughts, you’re cultivating a sense of trust and love from within that is helping to strengthen you.
Taking time away from the hustle and bustle ensures you aren’t forgetting yourself and prioritizing others.
Change how you compare yourself.
Comparison doesn’t have to be so negative. Sometimes comparing myself has helped me reach new heights. If you can learn to change your outlook on other people’s successes compared with yours, comparison can turn into motivation.
To stop seeing others as competition, try to connect more with the people around you. You will see that everyone has their struggles and insecurities just like you.
This has helped me immensely in realizing that no matter how great someone may look on the outside, their world on the inside may be completely different.
The other thing is to be grateful for where you are. There will always be someone who makes more money than you, looks better than you, and does more things than you, but there will also always be those who are in worse positions than you.
Thinking of three things each day that you are grateful for can completely change your mindset about where others are. Focus on yourself and your journey first before looking at what others are doing.